Hot Time In the Old Town Tonight
---
Announcements, announcements, announcements!
A terrible death to die, wahoo!
A terrible death to die, wahoo!
A terrible death to be talked to death,
Announcements!
Announcements, announcements, announcements!
--
The ants go marching one-by-one Hurrah! Hurrah!
The ants go marching one-by-one Hurrah! Hurrah!
The ants go marching one-by-one
The little one stopped to suck his thumb
And they all went marching
Down, around the town
Boom boom boom
The ants go marching two-by-two...
continue the verses with these changes:
Two-by-two: tie his shoe
Three-by-three: climb a tree
Four-by-four: close the door
Five-by-five: Do a jive
Six-by-six: pick up sticks
Seven-by-seven: go to Heaven
Eight-by-eight: close the gate
Nine-by-nine: check the time
Ten-by-ten: start again
---
Down on the banks of the Hanky Panky,
Where the bull frogs jump from bank to banky,
With a hee, hi, ho, hop,
Leaps off a lily with a KERPLOP.
---
I'm being eaten my a boa constrictor,
A boa constrictor, a boa constrictor
I'm being eaten by a boa constrictor
And I don't like it one bit
Oh no there goes my toe
Oh gee he's got my knee
Oh my there goes my thigh
Oh hum there goes my bum
Oh darn there goes my arm
Oh heck he's got my neck
Oh gee he's eaten me.
(repeat)
---
Hello Mudda, hello Fadda,
Here I am at Camp Granada.
Camp is very entertaining,
And they say we'll have some fun if it stops raining.
I went hiking with Joe Spivy;
He developed poison ivy.
You remember Leonard Skinner;
He got ptomain poisoning last night after dinner.
All the counselors hate the waiters,
And the lake has alligators,
And the head coach wants no sissies,
So he reads to us from something called "Ulysses".
Now I don't want this should scare ya,
But my bunk mate has malaria.
You remember Jeffrey Hardy,
They're about to organize a searching party.
Take me home, oh Mudda, Fadda,
Take me home, I hate Granada!
Don't leave me in the forest where
I might get eaten by a bear.
Take me home, I promise I will not make noise,
Or mess the house with other boys.
Oh, please don't make me stay,
I've been here one whole day.
Dearest Father, darling Mother,
How's my precious little brother?
Let me come home if you miss me,
I would even let Aunt Bertha hug and kiss me.
Wait a minute, it stopped hailing,
Guys are swimming, gals are sailing.
Playing baseball, gee that's betta,
Mudda, Fadda, kindly disregard this letter!
---
(to the tune of "The Battle Hymn of the Republic")
Mine eyes have seen the horror of the coming of the frogs.
They are sneaking through the swamps, they are lurking under logs.
You can hear their mournful croaking through the early morning fog.
The frogs keep hopping on.
Chorus:
Ribbit, ribbit, ribbit, croak, croak
Ribbit, ribbit, ribbit, croak, croak
Ribbit, ribbit, ribbit, croak, croak
The frogs keep hopping on.
The frogs have grown in numbers, and their croaking fills the air.
There's no place to escape to 'cause the frogs are everywhere.
They've eaten all the flies and now they're hungry as a bear.
The frogs keep hopping on.
I used to like the bullfrogs, like to feel their slimy skin.
Liked to put them in my teacher's desk and take them home again.
Now they're knocking at the front door, I can't let those frogs come in.
The frogs keep hopping on.
They have hopped into the living room and headed down the hall.
They have trapped me in the corner and my back's against the wall.
And when I open up my mouth to give a desperate call.
This is all that's heard:
--
(to the tune of "Oh, Susanna")
Chorus:
Going to Day Camp,
So don't you cry for me.
I'll come back good and dirty,
So you'll never know it's me.
I scrubbed the night before I left,
My hair was nice and clean.
My mother was so proud of me,
But not for long you see.
While hiking out at Day Camp,
I found the perfect pet.
But I had to leave my friend behind,
Because he scared the Vet.
--
---
Late last night when we were all in bed,
Old Lady Leary left a lantern in the shed.
Well, the cow kicked it over, and this is what they said:
"There'll be a hot time in the old town tonight!"
FIRE, FIRE, FIRE!
When you hear those bells go ding-a-ling,
All join 'round and sweetly you must sing.
And when the verse is through, in the chorus all join in:
"There'll be a hot time in the old town tonight!"
Silly variant:
Ten nights dark when bed we all were in,
Old Leary lady hung the shed her lantern in,
And when the kick cowed it over, she eyed her wink and said
"There'll be town hot in the time old tonight!"
--
(to the tune of "It's a Small World")
It's a world of centipedes, a world of moths,
It's a world of katydids, a world of wasps,
There's so much that we share that it's time we're aware,
It's an insect world.
Chorus:
It's an insect covered world,
It's an insect covered world,
It's an insect covered world,
It's an insect world.
It's a world of beetles, a world of fleas,
It's a world of caterpillars, a world of bees,
In this world that we know there is so much to show,
It's an insect world.
--
---
Chorus:
Keep on the sunny side, always on the sunny side,
Keep on the sunny side of life, YEE-HAW!
You will feel no pain as we drive you all insane, so
Keep on the sunny side of life!
(between choruses, do a series of knock-knock jokes, like the following:)
Leader: Knock knock!
All: Who's there?
Leader: Ether!
All: Ether who?
Leader: The Ether Bunny! HA HA HA HA...
Leader: Knock knock!
All: Who's there?
Leader: Nother!
All: Nother who?
Leader: Nother Ether Bunny! HA HA HA HA...
Leader: Knock knock!
All: Who's there?
Leader: Stella!
All: Stella who?
Leader: Stella Nother Ether Bunny! HA HA HA HA...
Leader: Knock knock!
All: Who's there?
Leader: Cargo!
All: Cargo who?
Leader: Cargo beep beep and run over all the Ether Bunnies! BOO HOO HOO...
Leader: Knock knock!
All: Who's there?
Leader: Boo!
All: Boo who?
Leader: Don't cry, the Ether Bunny will be back next year! YAY!
Leader: Knock, Knock!
All: Who's there?
Leader: Ya!
All: Ya who?
Leader: See, I told you he'd be back! HA HA HA HA!!
---
(to the tune of "Let There be Peace on Earth")
Let there be peas on Earth,
And take away broccoli;
Let there be peas on Earth,
For peas are what's meant to be.
Peas are delicious,
Round and firm and sweet;
Broccoli looks like a forest,
And trees were not meant to eat!
Please let there be peas on Earth,
But rid it of broccoli.
I'd like all peas on Earth,
But never the broccoli.
So, eat some peas,
Bring me some peas,
Peas are the best for me!
Let there be peas on Earth,
But take all the broccoli!
--
Oh, I'd rather suck on a lemon drop
Than try my luck with a lollypop
'Cause a lollypop I always drop
And it gets all over icky
Oh, it makes me sick
The way it sticks
It gets all over my hands
And with a jelly bean I'm always clean
But a lollypop I always drop
I've tried and tried
But still I can't find
A lollypop
POP!
That's half way refined
So, I'd rather suck on a lemon drop
Than try my luck with a lollypop
'Cause a lollypop I always drop
And it gets all over icky, icky, icky, icky, icky, BLAH!
---
(same tune as the "Brownie Smile Song")
I have something in my pocket that I found behind a log.
My leader said to turn it loose, but I want to keep my frog.
It's cool and green and slimy and it wiggles in my hand.
I also have a wooly worm, and a pocket full of sand.
(to the tune of "O Christmas Tree")
Oh, Tom the toad, Oh, Tom the toad,
Why are you lying on the road?
Oh, Tom the toad, Oh, Tom the toad,
Why are you lying on the road?
You did not see the car ahead;
Now you're all marked with tire tread.
Oh, Tom the toad, Oh, Tom the toad,
Why are you lying on the road?